Sunday, June 12, 2011

missing

i spent some time browsing through my google reader this evening.

when your “all items” has a 4 digit number next to it…it tends to get a little overwhelming.

so i began quickly scanning…and boy do i miss it.

i miss the cooking.
i miss the crafting.
i miss the photography.
i miss sewing.
i miss writing posts that make you me laugh.

i’m ready to engage in life again.

i am taking it slow though. as a should-have-been-expected follow up to my miserable and painful pregnancy, i am now enjoying a miserable and painful recovery.
i have not had difficult recoveries with any of my babies. despite all my nurses’ fears (“redheads bleed more!!!”) i’ve generally had uncomplicated deliveries—no drugs, no stitches, no problems.

i seem to have pushed it a bit too far this time: weird and debilitating pains in my belly (most likely a pulled abdomen muscle from pushing, and then exacerbated by my stupidly picking up little bear 5 days post-partum), some extra bleeding, and now a course of antibiotics for a stubbornly swollen uterus and strict instructions from my midwife to STAY IN BED another week…

please…DON’T GET ME WRONG.

i have this:

IMG_5319_4922_edited-1 IMG_5332_4935 

and of course that makes it all worthwhile.

she has fluffy soft hair and kissable lips. everyday i see her getting plumper and filling out with tiny rolls starting on her scrawny chicken legs (did i mention i produce CREAM not milk?). i stare at her and can’t believe i had another baby. i love her smell and her long fingers and her tiny shell-like ears…and the little satisfied happy noises she’s making right now next to me in bed.

IMG_5335_4938

who wouldn’t like that?

but i’m more of a doer than a sitter. googiedaddy keeps finding me sneaking a load of laundry in the washer…cleaning bedrooms…making beds…
and pushing me back to the bedroom to SIT. more. and it’s getting old.

slow and steady wins the race. baby steps. i’ll be back.

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