more words i don’t know how to say.

well. it’s been quite a couple of weeks. it’s been quiet here on the blog, and for good reason. i talked about the stomach bug that went through—3 of the 5 succumbed in the end. that was tag-teamed with the googiedaddy coming down with a massive flu and possible infection on top of it. dude, he was so sick. dude, i just said dude.

it was not a pleasant week. i lost track of how many times i changed sheets, how many loads of laundry i did, how many cups of tea and ginger ale i poured.

and then you think I AM SO OVER THIS and your dad texts you and says mom is really sick not sure if should go to hospital. so i drove over to find my poor momma curled in a ball on the bathroom floor with waves of pain. dad and i got her in bed, and after conferencing for a few minutes decided it was off to the hospital.

eventually i instagrammed a pic of my #DAREcember challenge from the room we were in…when we thought it was just a nasty stomach bug and she’d be home after some fluids. HA.

that was last sunday, she just got out of the hospital yesterday. it wasn’t a nasty stomach bug. actually they’re not really definitive on what it was, all the tests came back negative and ruled out e-coli and other bacterial nasties. but she was—and is—really sick.

so then you’re basically like I HAVE HAD IT UP TO HERE AND SO HELP ME I WILL CRY IF YOU LOOK AT ME CROSS-EYED. you know, your basic threat level orange or whatever.
and you know, in the best foreshadowing fashion, that this is where it really gets fun.

wednesday morning i jumped into the shower and called for gigi to come in with me. she’d been congested and i wanted her to try and clear out in a steamy shower. as soon as she took off her clothes and jumped in with me i noticed three dark bruises—two on her arms, one on her right hipbone.

here’s the thing: i can’t tell you why i knew they weren’t right. i have five children. i’ve probably seen 6.4 billion bruises in my mothering career so far. these were…off. they weren’t very large, but they were dark purple and in very odd places.

she doesn’t attend preschool and is rarely not with me, but i still looked in her eyes and asked if anyone hit her. she said no.

so we got out of the shower and i lotioned her up, taking that time to give her a good lookover. i noticed that she had little red dots on her neck, as if she had scratched it and broken tiny blood vessels. she also had a severely chapped lip—her bottom lip looked like she had chewed the snot out of it and was scabby and bloody. she had woken up with that a few days prior.

fortunately i have that honorary doctorate from google, which comes in super handy at times like this. i was simultaneously googling “dark bruises + chapped lips” while texting jeremy “please tell me i’m crazy right now, mmkay?”
he’s a good guy, so he complied.
”you’re crazy, calm down, she’s fine. she’s klutzy.”
but he wasn’t quite fast enough because i’d already found my answer: ITP. Immune or Idiopathic Thrombocytopenia Purpura.
winner winner chicken dinner.

ITP is basically your immune system going haywire. it begins attacking your platelets—the cells in your blood that are “sticky”—the ones responsible for clotting. when your immune system attacks your platelets they die off faster than new ones can be made in your bone marrow and your numbers plummet. normal platelet count is 150,000-350,000.
symptoms: bruises, bleeding of the mucosal membranes (i.e. lips), petechiae (the little red dots all over her skin).

it was too close. the symptoms fit too well. i was most definitely edging toward threat level red.

jeremy texted me back. i read about that thing. i think you should call the doctor.
so i did.
we were there by 11:40. the PA we saw (who i will never, ever see again) initially downplayed.
well kids get bruises.
eyeroll from me. okay thanks i guess i’m an idiot. listen to me: these are different.
then i showed her the neck dots. that got a response.
we headed off for bloodwork—which means wrapping my legs and arms around my baby while she screams and begs for this NOT to happen. ever done it? it’s not pleasant.

you know that feeling when you just KNOW? every fiber of your being just knows? i spent thursday alternately eating all my fingernails off and trying not to cry or puke and calling the doctor’s office to pressure them a little more. they finally called back at 11:30.
everything came back normal. RBC, WBC, all perfectly normal. oh—but her platelets clumped so we didn’t get a count on them. so we’ll put in an order for more labs.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME? the one number we needed was the one number we didn’t have. and now i have to go through the holding my baby down process again.

by thursday night she had a lot more bruises.

friday morning. i said to jeremy “do you think they check all the labs that come in and see if anything is really bad and they call them right away?”
our phone rang at 8:50.

gigi’s platelet levels were 23,000.

the PA was completely nonchalant about it. i’m going to have you make an appointment with a hematologist for followup.

i was like uhhh…wait. what? because i don’t know about you but i’ve googled this and i’m thinking 23,000 is a little more serious than “call a hemotologist for an appointment”. so she said if i wanted she could call too.
then i punched her in the neck.
okay no i didn’t but i said thanks but no thanks i’ll make my own phone calls.

we called a few different resources and hospitals. the PA called back.
uhhh…i spoke with the hematology department at CHOP and they’re working on an appointment for gisele but if they can’t get you in today you’ll probably have to take her to the ER.

NO KIDDING.

we packed for an overnight stay. we dressed. we were waiting for a last call back from a hospital in NJ. a nurse from the ped’s office called again: umm, **** (the PA) heard back from CHOP and they said you need to take Gisele to the ER right now. are you going?

saying that i was angry is a little bit of an understatement.

we got in the car and drove to the ER. we’re fortunate to be a 1/2 hour drive from some of the best hospitals in the U.S., but that doesn’t help at all when you’re taking one of your babies there.

gigi was cool with the hospital idea. we told her that her blood was sick, and she needed to go to the big hospital so they could help her. yes, she’s going to have to have more bloodwork. we explained an IV as best we could. she was less cool with that.

and from that point it basically went as expected: our nurse was awesome. like really, really awesome. she placed an IV, then took more blood for labs. we waited.
her platelets were up to 43,000.
the hematologist came down and talked with us. at that point it was basically confirmed for us: gisele has ITP.
her platelets had gone up and that was a good sign, but it didn’t change things too much. her risk of bleeding remained basically the same. what’s the treatment? well there’s a few different things they can try. but the bottom line is her body has to do this on it’s own. the treatments are just temporary stopgap measures, and with a level of 43,000 we can wait and watch and see if her body can figure it out on it’s own. there are children walking around with much lower numbers.
meanwhile: no wrestling, no jumping off things. if she bangs her head, immediately back to the ER. if she has a nosebleed or bleeding from anywhere that’s excessive or we can’t control after 1/2 hr, back to the ER. car accident or any major trauma, back to the ER.

ITP in children has a very good chance of spontaneous remission—it will go away and that’s it. it can take up to 9 months, it can happen in a couple of weeks. there is a chance it could become chronic. but we’ll cross that bridge if we come to it. 

gigi goes in monday morning to the hematology clinic. she’ll have bloodwork again to check her levels. driving 95 with her…ugh. i asked jeremy if it was insane to make her wear a helmet in the car? honestly, it’s not—the hematologist offered to send us home with one if it made us more comfortable.

so this is our new normal. i’m going to be 34 this month, and i didn’t really have any grey hairs. but everyone knows—these little rugrats will give ‘em to ya. a 5 year old with a platelet count of 43,000 who is trying to ride her new scooter through the house? i could feel them sprouting in my head.

in truth though, this, right now—knowing what we’re dealing with--is 1000x better than the not knowing of wednesday and thursday. it’s another thing to roll in to our life and keep on going.

as soon as we can remember how to say it.

perfectly imperfect: simple sewing book review (+ giveaway!)

in typical social media tangled web fashion, i can’t even remember how i first came across katie of the red kitchen. i know it was on instagram, where i followed the writing and development of her book like i was watching updates on the development of a baby. and i think, for her, it was.

so when she sent out the call for some bloggers who would be willing to review her book after it’s birth (!) i volunteered right away. i had watched this thing from it’s infancy, i kind of feel like a grandmom. or at least a really cool but distant aunt.



meet katie’s adorable bouncing baby book: SIMPLE SEWING: 30 Fast and Easy Projects for Beginners.

here’s the thing: i can’t even begin to count the amount of times people have said to me “i wish i could sew” or “you need to teach me to sew”. the truth is sewing isn’t rocket science. and if you have the ability to read and the desire to learn then this book is exactly what you need—a primer for learning the basics. learning your way around fabric and notions and a machine and pumping out a couple decent projects to build your confidence and get you excited.

let’s dive in, shall we?



the beginning of the book gives you an illustrated overview of the tools—both big and small—you’ll need, why you’ll need them, what kind to look for, and how to use them. everything from needles to irons.



next up is a detailed explanation of the techniques you’re going to need for all the book’s projects: how to pin, how to stitch…all the basics.



then the book is broken up into (very logical) groupings of projects, which makes it easy to find the one you’re looking for.



and here’s where the book really shines—not only are there gorgeous full-color and full-page illustrations throughout…



each step of each project has a corresponding photo showing you exactly what to do. if you’re a visual learner this is priceless. even as an experienced sewer there are times i simply do not understand a written instruction in a pattern. it is quite true: a picture is worth a thousand words.

and at the back of the book you’ll find all the patterns for your projects, which can be traced or copied. or cut right out if you’re a rebel.



so what did i do with my book?

my girls are some of the people who have asked me countless times “will you teach me to sew?” they want to Make Things. i even bought them their own machine. but i know my limits and a big one is that i am just NOT a teacher. i don’t have the patience, the organizational skills…i want to jump in and fix the mistakes myself, make it perfect, make it right the way i would do it.
this is tough to admit--but i even seriously entertained the thought of putting the girls in a sewing class at joann’s. how dumb is that? i feel strongly that they should learn to sew, but i convinced myself i lacked the ability to be their teacher.

this book serves as the perfect buffer. i realize now it was just what i needed. even the best of teachers uses a textbook as the basis for what they’re teaching.
this is our sewing class book.

i set ava loose on it first, and she picked the toy camera project.



i let her pick fabrics, and helped her cut her pieces. i gave her some little tips, showed her how to organize everything and how to follow the step-by-step directions. i was there to guide and lend a helping hand, but she did it.



at first she waited for my guidance between steps, but by the end she was off and running on her own. i’ve given her basic sewing machine instruction, so with the illustrated instructions in the book she could easily proceed without my help.



and in the end she had a toy camera.



an actual for real project that she made herself. are the stitches wonky? the circles less circle-y and more octagon-y? yup.



and that’s what makes it perfect.
but we didn’t stop there. that’s the fun of a house full of kiddos. when word spreads that there’s “projects” happening…



gigi wanted in. and the book was awesome yet again: she picked a project and fabric and we got to work. i was a little more involved this time, but we learned how to follow directions, how to measure and cut and pin…



she sat on my lap for the sewing—official Pin Puller and Presser Foot Lifter.



then we pushed out corners and filled our warmers with rice…



and voila. two hand warmers. also perfectly imperfect.



she was nervous about how hot they were (not very)



so she donned some protective…socks.
and there you have it.



these two little projects represent together about an hour and a half of my time and a monetary investment of $0.
but more importantly—they represent the first time we have successfully done sewing projects from start to finish together. they show me that i can teach my girls to sew, and watch it happen without frustration on any of our parts. i didn’t realize what i was missing all along was direction for me, not them. (yes yes, there’s a “priceless” joke in here somewhere. i’ll spare you.)

so, now that i’ve touched your hearts so deeply you can’t wait to have such memory-making moments with your own offspring (or you want to learn yourself)…



you can purchase a copy of katie’s SIMPLE SEWING book from any of these retailers:
Amazon
Barnes & Noble
Books & Things

you can also check out some other projects from/reviews of katie's book by visiting her website.
and be sure and swing by today's other reviewer--the incredible delia creates--and see what she did!

AND you also have a chance to win a copy of SIMPLE SEWING here by entering below!

before i go i just want to say again that this book is seriously awesome—i honestly mean it. if you want to teach someone—whether an adult or a child to sew, or you want to teach yourself you sew, this book is a must-have place to start. thanks, katie, for letting me be a part of your virtual baby shower book tour!

*please note this contest is open to US shipping addresses only. 

a Rafflecopter giveaway

party time. excellent.

as i lay in my cell phone-lit room last night pondering various metaphors to begin this post, i struck upon one that seems fairly obvious. but it fits, so here goes.
it’s like a storm. you see the big black thunderheads off in the distance, but first you’re optimistic—cocky even. pshaw. that’s gonna pass us right by. good westerly wind will blow it right on past.

but it doesn’t work that way—the clouds continue to build and drift menacingly closer and before you know it drops of rain are hitting your shoulders and you’re still thinking it’s okay. really. we’re going to be okay because this will be quick and you know what? in a way it’s almost good. we can use the rain.

it doesn’t much matter what kind of face you put on it though. in the end it’s going to happen just like you knew it would from the first sign of inclement weather. so when it’s like threat level magenta or something and panic mode hits and you’re running for shelter (and now i’m mixing metaphors but it’s okay because IT’S THAT BAD) the last thing you can think is we’ll all be alright in the end. we can make it through because we have plenty of canned food and a good clean up team.

here it comes people. and i hope you’re ready.

it’s like a tornado. no. it’s like wildfire combined with a tornado. not good enough.  make that a wildfire enhanced sharknado, because when you have five kids and the first one cries “my belly hurts” you kinda feel like the lady spying the thunderheads.

then that one starts hurling and you’re all hey. we can do this. you’re still not so sleep-deprived that you can’t joke with your significant other in the middle of the night. babe, if you’re gonna spew, spew in this. ::gigglesnort::
you’re awesome, you got this, changing sheets and doing laundry and running baths at 3 am is kind of exhilirating in a deep-in-the-trenches-of-parenthood-these-are-the-moments-that-make-up-our-lives sort of way.

but by the end of it you’re creeping cautiously from your shelter, blinking in the sunlight and whispering it’s alright. we have plenty of canned food and a good cleanup team.

we were hit hard two years ago, and i waxed poetically about it then. but last year we were spared and i should have known—the odds were certainly NOT in our favor for this year.

one down, four to go.
errr….i’m sorry. update. make that two down, three to go. wildfire sharknado, people.
i find myself pondering such brain benders as how old should a child be to have to dump and rinse their own puke bucket without you being a Bad Mommy? because i gotta tell ya, about 5 is my limit. ::heave, heave::

and not to be completely disgusting…okay, yes sorry i’m about keeping it real. so to be completely disgusting and because my husband and i came of age in the 90’s we think we’re terribly funny when we say, dude. she didn’t throw up. she blew chunks. because yeah, that’s exactly what elliot did. and once you know the difference you KNOW the difference.

and elliot—who shall henceforth be known as Patient Zero, lay there listening she looked up at me with ruddy cheeks and glassy eyes and said…

chunks.

yes, elliot. chunks.

mommy. chunk is not yummy. chunks is stinky.

you’re absolutely right elliot. now can someone pass me the can opener.

practically impractical: pattern anthology winter wonderland collection

so a couple of months ago i got an email, basically saying hey wanna be a part of the PATTERN ANTHOLOGY WINTER WONDERLAND COLLECTION BLOG TOUR? to which i promptly said YES. der. srsly. i’m no dummy.

and then they sent photos of the patterns and asked which we’d like to do and i was all that one, and that one, and that one and ALL OF THEM.

no, really. i wanted to make all of them. but i decided to be a good girl. a Practical Momma who would a)evaluate what my girls actually needed, and b) sew from my stash instead of buying more fabric. so it was a pair of Tree Climber Trousers for Elliot,who desperately needs more pants, refashioned from a pair of my stretch jeans with a busted zipper, and an Amaryllis dress for Gigi, who—shockingly—needs more dresses.

this was absolutely my intention. even as i drove to the fabric store…just to look, it was still my intention. but when $2/yard lovely drapey navy cottons, and the PERFECT wintery lining—also $2/yard!—just JUMP right out at you…well. what’s a girl to do?

what’s a girl to do? i’ll tell you what a girl’s to do: she starts with the practical. the necessary. the reasonable.

the upcycled Tree Climber Trousers, and the sturdy navy Amaryllis Dress.

cute, right? and then i packed up my sewing machine thankyouandgoodnight.

yeah, that was a good one. i mean, you’ve seen the winter wonderland collection, haven’t you?

behold: the golden mocha brown taffeta matching AMARYLLIS DRESSES and matching fuzzy JULIET CAPELETS.

reasonable and practical can go lay an egg.

let’s talk about these, shall we?

elliot and gigi both have an amaryllis dress, which—get this—is reversible! one side is done in the navy cotton, one side in this taffeta i had in the stash (actually an upholstery remnant my baby daddy brought home for me. he’s good like that. i put them through the washer and dryer before using. that’s my litmus test on whether it will work as kid’s clothes).
this pattern is from melissa of BLANK SLATE PATTERNS, and it’s AWESOME. seriously. it is based it off a vintage pattern, the fit is adorable, the design is adorable, really i can’t say enough about this dress. 

and i 150% wish i had better photos of just the dress—but it was so cold there was no cape removal, and so overcast that my inside shots are a blur. but trust me—these dresses are crazy cute.

the dress is made to be one piece that goes over the head. the front goes around to the  back and snaps, and the back comes around the front and ties in a bow.

one side practical, one side party so you’re ready for anything. it’s like the mullet of dresses.

except, no.

moving on: the capelets. THE CAPELETS. i think even edna mode would change her mind if she saw these.

the JULIET CAPELET (ha! prize for best name to kate) is from SEE KATE SEW patterns. its a super quick sew with two hood options—rounded or pixie.

obviously i did one of each ;) i also cut elliot’s size 3 to the length of the size 5, and gigi’s size 5 got an extra inch of length. and e’s got a yarn poof on the hood, because OH MY WORD THE CUTE.

they’re made from this fuzzy fluffy stuff from joann’s, which you must cut with scissors in one hand and a vacuum in the other. particularly if you’re cutting on your dining room table like i was. fuzzy food is never fun.

it’s lined with this winter wonderland/ski resort themed lining fabric i got for $2/yard!!! woohoo! i know nothing about it, save that it looks vintage and i love it. and based on some of the other fabrics in the shop, there’s probably a better than good chance that it is real vintage. ha.

this lining fabric is what dictated the color scheme for the entire outfit. i love it that much.

so i put them in their matching twirly dresses and fluffy capes and they look like the most adorable little squishy elf pixie fuzzy wuzzy things i ate them both for breakfast the end.

okay, i didn’t eat them really. but when i got them all dressed there may have been teenage fangirl level squealing accompanied by excited clapping of hands. ::cough cough jeremy cough cough::

obviously not from gigi, who was clearly less than thrilled about being outside for photos. elliot, on the other hand, was pleased as punch and super cooperative. (note to self: bribery with donuts works wonders on e)

together this capelet and dress set make one ridiculously adorable outfit, no? but i have an entire second set of outfits to discuss…

and this time gigi was much more cooperative—due partly to being dressed a little warmer, and partly (mainly) due to the fact that we told her she looked like a little french girl. she practiced saying “bonjour. je m’appelle gigi” the entire way across the street.

so yes, this is the same AMARYLLIS DRESS as in the above photos, simply flipped around so the navy cotton side is showing. cool, right? it looks adorable as a little jumper for the cooler weather, and with a matching beret your little gal will be tres magnifique. vraiment. ;)

and for ms. e we have a lovely pair of TREE CLIMBER TROUSERS.

these bad boys are the brain child of andrea, who designs and curates GoTo PATTERNS, and also looks a scarily large amount like my own mother. so i can never be mean to her.

elliot is in desperate need of pants, and these fit the bill perfectly—and not just because they cost all of $0.the fit is great—and that’s even with my alterations to the pattern.

some were NBD. exhibit A: the lines of decorative stitching i added to the back pockets…

and the front pockets, which i also cut into a more curved shape than what the pattern has.

but i reused the waistband and button from my pants—never even took the button off, just lined it up and stitched it on. and i eliminated the reinforced knee pads, just cutting the front legs in one piece rather than the three of the pattern.

and i love them.  wanna hear something crazy? besides stretch pants and jammie pants, which don’t really count as sewing pants IMO, as best as i can recall this is the 2nd pair of pants i’ve ever made. harrison’s suit pants being the first.

crazy, i know.

now let’s talk about the nuts in the photos. together these two are quite the pair.

a new development: elliot is turning into gigi’s mini-me. whatever gigi does, elliots watches…

and copies…

oh man are we in for some serious trouble.

and there you have it, folks! there are even more patterns in the PATTERN ANTHOLOGY WINTER WONDERLAND COLLECTION, which you can buy complete here:

or you can buy just the BOY’S collection and GIRL’S collections separately!

enjoy!

disclaimer: none of the links in this post are affiliate links, i just put them there because i love you and the pattern designers. i wasn’t compensated in any way for this post, but i did receive copies of the patterns for review purposes. all opinions are my own, cause i have enough of my own and i don’t need anyone else’s. pffft.